Students Speak Out: Minnesota
Hugging is Bad?
At a school in Illinois they have banned public displays of affection. This is reasonable I can understand, but the way it is being enforced I find a little wacko. Punishment for hugging your best friends on Friday before you go home for the weekend at the end of the day is a little bit over the top, a day of detention for each hug. Is the school a place where we are too good for hugging? What kind of public displays of affection are not appropriate for school and what can be acceptable? I don't know if the way this school is addressing the problem would be the right way to work on this problem . . .
With some of the changes projected for the Minneapolis Public Schools in the near future, will there be something like this, a silly or not well thought out policy? Will we make large mistakes in our proposed remodeled schools?
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071106/ap_on_fe_st/odd_detention_for_h...
With some of the changes projected for the Minneapolis Public Schools in the near future, will there be something like this, a silly or not well thought out policy? Will we make large mistakes in our proposed remodeled schools?
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071106/ap_on_fe_st/odd_detention_for_h...
Tags: affection, hugging, punishment
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Kim FB on -
From the article Brett posted:
District Superintendent Sam McGowen said that he thinks the penalty is fair and that administrators in the school east of St. Louis were following policy in the student handbook.
It states: "Displays of affection should not occur on the school campus at any time. It is in poor taste, reflects poor judgment, and brings discredit to the school and to the persons involved."
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Are you kidding me? When the football team hugs each other after a touchdown, will they be given detention? I mean, after all, it's poor judgment and brings discredit to the school.
This is a great example of adults setting a policy that alienates students.
So -- what do you think the adults are trying to get at here? No french kissing; groping; etc.? If so, what would be a better way to handle it?
We could make a long list of no nos, but that would probably be just as ridiculous.
I think there is a letter of a policy, and a spirit of the policy. Adults could use the policy to justify teachable moments (like telling a groping couple that such behavior is inappropriate in public), but need not follow it in cases like the one in the article.
Thoughts???
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Permalink Reply by Victoria Ford on
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I agree with both of you - I doubt that hugging your friends on Friday afternoon was what was intended by the student handbook.
What would the policy look like if students wrote it themselves? What would you ban?
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Permalink Reply by Brett on -
What about some of the things that could happen to Minneapolis public schools in the future? What can we do to prevent this type of "oops" with the policy interpretation or actions taken?
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Permalink Reply by Annie W on -
Students would definitely write it differently...I think it depends on which students write it. Do the kissing ones write it or the occasional huggers?
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Permalink Reply by Brett on
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A combination of all different types of students so they are capable of coming to a mutual agreement on something. That way there is a less likely possibility of having problems with how students handle or interpret the policy. I don't believe it is right to exclude a type of student during decisions, (not that you were saying we should,) it will decrease the problems in the future if more of us can be involved somehow and share all sides of the story.
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Permalink Reply by Kim FB on
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I replied earlier to this, but it's not here! I'll type it again...
I think this is a great train of thought. If the groping couples and friendly huggers got together to put together a policy I bet it would make a lot of sense and have a greater impact on the problem the school is actually trying to solve. What if an students walked through the halls for a day and observed behaviors and invited students from all different behavioral groups to a meeting to design a new policy?
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Permalink Reply by Ashley on -
i think the whole banning hugging thing is insane. but plus i am a very huggy person. i hug my friend all the time. and i understand banning PDA so you don't have to see other kids be all over each other in the halls. but hugs?
i was talking about this with my grandma and cousins and we all thought it was kinda weird.
but for me if they ban hugging in my school, im going on a hugging spree.
AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME lol.
i love hugs, and i love giving people hugs, hugs makes people happy.
i rather give someone i know a hug and get a detention than seeing them sad.
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Permalink Reply by Brett on
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You make a good point, "i rather give someone i know a hug and get a detention than seeing them sad." You never know how your actions will effect someone's life, negative or positively. Cheering someone up and making them feel better when they really need it shouldn't be something you have to question . . .
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Brett - I think what we're doing right now is what we can do to prevent this kind of "oops" in the future. The people who are affected by a decision should be involved in making the decision. That doesn't necessarily mean that students will get the final vote on everything, but at the very least the "deciders" should be paying attention. I bet we could resolve the hugging issue pretty easily, if the administration talked with students.
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Permalink Reply by Ashley on
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i know, today i was practically holding my friend why she was balling her eyes out. i wonder if my school had that ban what would they do if saw me hugging my friend to cheer her up.
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Permalink Reply by Kim FB on
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Okay, I think we all agree that it is not a good idea to ban all hugging. I also think we agree (at least those of us talking in this forum so far) that groping at school is probably inappropriate.
So I'm bringing out the virtual table and I'm asking Brett, Annie, and Ashley to join the "Virtual Committee to Address Wrongly-Created Ban on All Public Displays of Affection." I'm also inviting any other students reading this who want to be involved to join the committee. It's not a huge effort, and I don't intend for you to go cRaZy spending your time on this, but I think we should have a serious talk about what policy or practice would work instead. Whatever you come up with I will ask you to respectfully email to the Superintendent in Illinois and to the MPS School Board (telling them about what's happening in Illinois and how you would like to avoid that here...).
I think we should start with each of you making a suggestion about what the policy should instead be. You'll probably be challenged (by me and others, as well as by each other) to back up your ideas or to think about how others would react to it, etc.
So let's have at it. Suggestions, please???
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Permalink Reply by Laura on -
At my school we can have no physical contact which i think is pretty stupid when i was growing up if you were mean to some one you gave them a hug and said sorry or if some one was sad you gave them a hug and told them you hope they feel better know it like a crime to give some one a hug i don't get it
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